So, our family has changed recently with the arrival of a new foster daughter. This is the biggest change in our family since the arrival of our adopted daughter nearly 7 years ago. It moves us from a settled, comfortable state to working out new roles and routines. There are additional school runs to cater for, a different level of games to play and reading to help with, and training to apply to show how our family works – as we are all so different.
This time, our older daughters are now a trainee teacher and working in a nursery, so they bring new skills to help. Our 11 year old is enjoying taking on a big sister role, and Aly and I try to keep it all as calm as possible and trying to ensure that we share ourselves around to make sure no-one feels left out. We can step back and see the jockeying for position and have the pleasure of seeing new relationships – and new levels of relationship – being built.
So, why am I sharing this? Because it is just the same for the teams we have in our organisations. Maybe someone leaves and is – or isn’t – replaced, someone new joins the team, we are given new or additional responsibilities, we move location. There are lots of reasons that could bring changes to our team. How do we react? What change does it bring? There is some sparring and jockeying for position as new teammates get to know each other and learn about each other’s skills and abilities.
There may be some teething problems, some arguments, some heated discussion. There will be some suspicion about motives and agendas, some concern about what is being said to management and others. It takes time for trust to be built up.
But usually, unless the new person is lazy or incompetent, that person shows their worth, adds value to the team and then trust is built up. It isn’t long before the newbie is accepted as part of the team and it is as though they have always been there. Everyone adjusts to accommodate the skills they bring and the team moves into a position where optimal performance levels are achieved. Then another change occurs and we start the process all over again!
It reminds me of Tuckman’s Stages of Group Development:
- Stage One – Group bonding (Forming)
- Stage Two – Group conflict and fragmentation (Storming)
- Stage Three – Group maintenance and the development of norms (Norming)
- Stage Four – Group working and achieving its aims (Performing)
- Stage Five – Group disbanding (Adjourning, sometimes referred to as Mourning)
At what stage are the teams that you are part of? Forming, storming, norming, performing or mourning? For me the best stage has to be performing – but all of the other stages are necessary to get to that stage. So don’t worry about the sparring when a team changes, and the arguments that occur – this is all part of the storming stage as people fight for territory and responsibility, just encourage your team to get through this stage fairly quickly.
Being part of a team is fantastic – I love it as it brings different levels and areas of skills together that I can learn from and I love to develop and deepen my level of knowledge and experience.
So let me encourage you, as I do my family, to get to know the others in your team better, build deeper relationships, use each other’s strengths and look for the opportunities to develop as and when there are changes to your teams.